close

Privacy guaranteed - Your email is not shared with anyone.

Dear BOCEPHUS

Discussion in 'Sound Off' started by Bocephus, Mar 13, 2006.

  1. Since becoming a member I have figured out that most of you are deranged and mental in some way.

    I have added this feature to the site at no cost.

    If you have a problem or need some guidance...just ask Bocephus
    I will respond to those with problems with the whole hearty truth.

    lets begin
     
  2. Dear Bo,

    I often find myself hunting with my buddies and low and behold, I forgot to bring my lunch for the day. I see my buddie's lunch bag on the seat of the truck. He has a sandwich, cut in halves, and apple. My question is what to do in this situation. Should I eat only half the sandwich, leaving him half, eat the whole sandwich and write an IOU note to leave in his lunch bag, eat the entire lunch and hide the bag...when he asks where his lunch is at, pretend as though I never saw a lunch sack on the seat of the truck.

    Signed,
    Hungry in Columbia City
     

  3. Hungry,
    Eat the whole thing, but dont hide the bag. There are two lessons to be learned here. One, dont leave home without lunch and two, dont leave your lunch where someone can find it.

    Bo
     
  4. Dear Bo,
    I recently bought a new ultra light spinnin' rig. I take my wife out for a fun day of fishing, and through lapse of judgement, allow her to fish a while with the new rod. As we fish, we happen upon an amazing honey hole with slab sized gills. My wife steps onto a soft part of the shore and starts to rapidly sink into this foul smelling ooze! My question...was I wrong in my reply to her pleads for help by asking her to fist "hand me the rod" and cast again to those monster gills?

    Signed,
    Sleeping with the dogs in Columbia City
     
  5. Dear doctor Bo,

    Long time reader, first time writer. Married for over 3yrs now, I'm running out of stories to tell my wife, so I can snick out to the woods or lake. Any suggetions? Divorce is out of the question cause I know she will take the boat!!

    signed,
    liar-liar my boats on fire
     
  6. My instincts were flawed here. I shred the bag and claimed a racoon climbed into the truck while we were out.
     
  7. Dear Penthouse, er....I mean Dear Bocephus!!

    Dear Father Bocephus, Forgive me for I have sinned. I have been worshipping giant whitetail bucks from about Sept. to March. My question for you, your excellency, is Why did the Good Lord allow for antlers to grow bigger every year if he didn't want bucks to grow giant sets of antlers; which in turn gives us hopeless, helpless, zombies something to strive for in our deer hunting?
     
  8. Dear Bo, I've got a man sized predicament......... Prom dress for the daughter, or a new Orvis fly rod for father. Being that your a family man- I know you can help.;)
     
  9. Bo, it's me again..... I can do without the fly rod, would it be so wrong if I changed it to a new Hoyt? (TRYKON PLEEZE!)
     
  10. If Hickory Nut shows up on here asking for guidance I am gonna puke!!:cheeky-sm

    Seriously Bo, I would like to pose this question! If you have a buddy that likes to tell tall tales and believe in the unbelievable, how would you approach it???

    Please take your time. :cwm27:
     


  11. Sleeping,
    This need no reply, but i'll reply anyway. Havent you ever heard there are always more fish in the sea??? You should have went for the gills! The old saying never said anything about there being more fish in the POND. Wives are a dime a dozen and slab gills are worth a bit more.
    Bo
     
  12. liar liar,
    To pull this off with no questions you have to plan ahead. Heres an idea. Tell your wife that you are thinking about being a sponsor to a drug addict or alcoholic. If you were a sponsor your wife couldnt meet them anyway...tell her its a confidentiality thing. Then when its time to hit the lake or woods, just have a friend call you. You tell your wife that you need to meet the poor soul that needs help. This will give you many fun filled times ALONE or with PALS.
    Bo
     
  13. My son,
    God has a plan for everything. We have no control, eveything we think "we" came up with was already written by our lord in heaven. So I think we should give thanks to God for thinking up the OBR for all of us.
    Bo
     
  14. Crooked,
    This is a hard decision. First off, how many daughters do you have? Is the daughter in question your favorite?? If she has been good and doesnt go out and smoke dope with guys that ware their drawers hanging down to their knees I say get the dress and put the fly rod on the back burner. If she has acted up in any way, buy the rod and make the prom dress yourself out of a set of curtins from the Dollar Store.

    Bo

    Hmmmm, a new Hoyt...if her date really likes her he'll buy the stupid dress!