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Jeff Foxworthy's Version of Michigan

Discussion in 'Comedy' started by goggleye57, Mar 1, 2005.

  1. Jeff Foxworthy's Version of Michigan
    > >
    > > If you consider it a sport to gather your food by
    > > drilling through 18 inches of ice and sitting there
    > > all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might
    > > live in Michigan
    > >
    > > If you're proud that your region makes the national
    > > news 96 nights each year because Pelston is the
    > > coldest spot in the nation, you might live in
    > > Michigan
    > >
    > > If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November
    > > through March,you might live in Michigan
    > >
    > > If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five
    > > months out of the year, you might live in Michigan.
    > >
    > > If someone in a store offers you assistance, and
    > > they don't work there, you might live in Michigan
    > >
    > > If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around
    > > the middle of his forehead, you might live in
    > > Michigan
    > >
    > > If you have worn shorts and a coat at the same time,
    > > you might live in Michigan
    > >
    > > If your town has an equal number of bars and
    > > churches, you might live in Michigan
    > >
    > > If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation
    > > with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might
    > > live in Michigan
    > >
    > > You know you're a true MICHIGANDER
    > > when.............;
    > >
    > > 1. Vacation means going up north on I-75.
    > >
    > > 2 . You measure distance in hours.
    > >
    > > 3. You know several people who have hit a deer more
    > > than once.
    > >
    > > 4. You often switch from heat to air in the same
    > > day.
    > >
    > > 5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow
    > > during a raging blizzard, without flinching.
    > >
    > > 6. You see people wearing camouflage at social
    > > events.
    > >
    > > 7. You install security lights on your house and
    > > garage and leave both unlocked.
    > >
    > > 8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your
    > > girlfriend knows how to use them.
    > >
    > > 9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit
    > > over a snowsuit.
    > >
    > > 10. Driving is better in the winter because the
    > > potholes are filled with snow.
    > >
    > > 11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter,
    > > still winter and road construction. (Amen)
    > >
    > > 12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
    > >
    > > 13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of
    > > a deer next to your blue spruce.
    > >
    > > 14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking
    > > age.
    > >
    > > 15. Down South to you means Ohio
    > >
    > > 16. A brat is something you eat.
    > >
    > > 17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his
    > > new pole shed.
    > >
    > > 18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.
    > >
    > > 19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to
    > > frost.
    > >
    > > 20. You have more miles on your snow blower than
    > > your car.
    > >
    > > 21. You find 0 degrees a little chilly.
    > >
    > > 22. You drink pop and bake with soda.
    > >
    > > 23. Your doctor tells you to drink Vernors and you
    > > know it's not medicine.
    > >
    > > 24. You know what a Yooper is.
    > >
    > > 25. You think owning a Honda is Un-American.
    > >
    > > 26. You know that UP is a place not a direction
    > >
    > > 27. You know it's possible to live in a thumb.
    > >
    > > 28. You understand that when visiting Detroit, the
    > > best thing to wear is a Kevlar vest.
    > >



     

  2. Hey thats not funny i've allways lived in Indiana and 99%of that applies.NO thats still funny.:biggrin: :bonk:
     
  3. Somebody needs to write one on ----you know you are a Hoosier when......
     
  4. here one for you .when in indiana you know you had to much to drink when you here a knock on the door and your response is hoosier
     
  5. how about when you see a chair flying across a floor you yell "go bobby knight"