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These are for the ladies

Discussion in 'Comedy' started by ccavacini, Jan 25, 2007.

  1. ccavacini

    ccavacini Super Mod Mod

    Some for the ladies

    One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-
    shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"
    "It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
    He yelled back, " University of Oklahoma ."
    And they say blondes are dumb...
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    A couple is lying in bed. The man says,
    "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world."
    The woman replies, "I'll miss you..."
    -----------------------------------------------------------
    "It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?"
    "Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
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    Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
    A: A rumor
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -
    Q: Why do little boys whine?
    A: They are practicing to be men.
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    Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
    A: Trustworthy.
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    Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
    A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
    -----------------------------------------------------------
    Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
    A: It helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
    -----------------------------------------------------------
    Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
    A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals"