Why I fired my Secretary ... Last week was my birthday and I didn’t feel very much like waking up that morning. As I went downstairs for breakfast, I was hoping my wife would be pleasant and say “Happy Birthday!” and possibly have a present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone “Happy Birthday!” I thought to myself, “well, that’s marriage for you, but maybe the kids will remember.” My kids came to breakfast and didn’t say a word either. So when I left the office, I was feeling pretty low, unappreciated, and somewhat disappointed. As I walked into my office, my secretary Donna blurted out, “Good morning Boss, Happy Birthday!”. I felt a little better that, at least, someone had remembered me on this day. I worked until one o’clock and then Donna knocked on my door and said, “You know, it’s such a beautiful day outside, and it is your birthday, let’s go out to lunch, just the two of us.” I said, “Thanks Donna, that’s the greatest thing I’ve heard all day!” We went to lunch, but we didn’t go where we would normally go. instead we dined at a little place with a private table; we had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Donna said, “You know, it’s such a beautiful day. We don’t need to go back to the office, do we?” I responded, “I guess not; what do you have in mind?” She said, “Let’s go over to my apartment.” After arriving at her apartment, Donna turned to me and said, “Boss, if you don’t mind, I’m going to step into the bedroom for a moment. I’ll be right back.” “Ok.” I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake….. followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers; all singing “Happy Birthday.” And I just sat there….. On the couch….. Mouth wide open….. Naked!!!